Okay. I realized the problem. I now know why I have been a whiny little bitch lately, delinquent on my talents and creativity. Here it is. Ready? Okay. Cuz this is it. Comin’ atcha: I have neglected to harness the power of my inspirations.
You see, I walk around constantly inspired by this and that and him and her. There is no apparent lack of beautiful, hilarious, mojo-filled goodness in the reality I perceive. For instance, there is this unbelievably green patch of grass between these perfectly spaced tall narrow trees in the Presidio. As my bus passes that grove every day at around WHAM! I am hit with unadulterated green inspiration! I mean, it is GREEN. And let me tell you: I love green. And this is green. Some days tears fill my eyes seeing this particularly cosmic shade of earth. Wow. That heaping helping of inspiration then continues to ride the bus home and walk three blocks to my home and walk up the stairs and open my door and… ooh, this episode of Seinfeld is a good one.
Where was I? Oh yes. My inspirations. There is absolutely no lack. But where do these jolts of positive juicy worldliness go? I’ve been allowing most of them evaporate and tossing the rest into spurts of physical exertion of the climbing variety. As fun as gym-climbing with my buddies is, there is only so much vim and vigor you can stuff into two or three nights a week on fake rock. Up and up and ooh! The view of that familiar blue carpet is … wow. Worth it. Worth this completely un-epic grueling session of crimping on glorified stucco. With a ceiling.
But not even that. Even climbing outside might not be able to transform me from my head-achey jaw-clenching gotta-get-outta-here self lately. I think I have been majorly overlooking my love of the written word and of music. I am so inspired by the writing of my friends and of climbers I look up to. I am inspired when I hear of what the people I know and respect are doing creatively. I am inspired by my hilarious friends who give me delicious doses of loud sudden laughter. I am inspired by documentaries of ordinary people doing extraordinary things. I am inspired by music-making of many sorts. And yet… I don’t get in on any of this action, really. I complain about my job I’m getting burnt out on, and think of all the great things I want to do when I can afford not to work and do whatever I want… but I’m currently suffering a self-inflicted lapse in doing all of those things I think I like to do. Such as making music, taking road trips, being publicly goofy, and writing, for instance.
So that’s why I’m writing – Now. And I’ll be holding myself to it by beginning this blog, and writing for many of the Nows to come. I hope it reminds me of the outlets that are available to express my glowing reviews of Life As We Know It; that writing here regularly will jumpstart my dormant creativity in the other areas of my life and make use of the heaps of inspiration I have been continually greeting with a shrug of my shoulders.